The Infamous “Aboot”

First up: Canadians do not say “aboot”. Let me say this again: THEY DO NOT SAY “ABOOT”. However. They do not pronounce it the way we (American/British/etc accented people) do. They pronounce it quite literally, actually. Take the word, “about”, and then take out the “a”. What are you left with? Boat. A - boat. It’s kind of like they’re saying “a boat”. To fine tune it a bit more, add a “w” at the end of “bout”: a-boawt. The purpose of the “w” being to press your lips closer together to make the “boat” sound ALMOST sound like “boot”. But not boot. It’s “a-boat”. As in, “I went fishing in a boat”. Don’t forget to purse your lips toward the end of the word. Aboawt. And then of course, do it mildly, but not so mildly that a non-Canadian wouldn’t notice.

Pajamas

We say “puh-jah-muz”. We pronounce the “ja” like “jah”, the “ah” like, “Open your mouth and say ‘Aaah’”. Canadians pronounce the “ja” in the way they pronounce “jam”. So, in essence, they pronounce that literally as well. They say “puh-JAM-uz”. 

Garage

We say “guh-rah-zhe”. Again, we pronounce the second “a” in garage in a very dainty “ahh” way, plus we pronounce the “ge” like a “zh” or a harsh “sh”. Very French. Guh-rahh-zzhh. Canadians pronounce the second “a” like the “a” in “apple”. And they pronounce the “g” exactly as it was meant to be pronounced, like “dg”. Very harsh. “Guh-raa-dge”. Nothing dainty about it.

Groceries

Okay, we all know how “groceries” is supposed to be pronounced, right? You see that letter “c”? Makes an “ess” sound? Well, Canadians say it like this: “grosheries”. This, to me, is like nails on a chalkboard. I don’t care if I’m a citizen, I will never - I repeat - NEVER say “grosheries”. I know my American accent butchers the words “garage” and “pajamas”, but man. It’s “groSSSeries”. Not “grosheries”. Yuck. 

FYI, this is a fun post targeted mainly at my Asian and/or American friends. And I assume many of my Canadian friends will disagree with me (especially about the “about” part; say what you want, but you guys don’t say abOUT the way we do. You say abouwt), and that being said, not all Canadians say “grosheries” either (thank god), and I do have a few friends who actually say “about” American-style. But for the most part, these rules apply, especially as the towns get smaller. So! Follow these rules the next time you drop by our lovely country, and you’ll fit right in. 

But say “grosheries” and I will smack you.